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Remember Dave Grohl’s coffee addiction chronicled in the “Fresh Pots!” video? Well, now he’s revisiting that viral hit in a new Foo Fighters video for “FreshPotix.”

In the faux prescription drug ad, Grohl is seen looking back on his infamous coffee addiction. He says, “My ability to maintain personal relationships and solid bowel movements were compromised by crippling sleep deprivation and noxious coffee breath. As the bean took over, I found myself doing anything for a fix.”

He continued, “My roast grew darker and darker until I finally hit pot bottom. I couldn’t be there for the ones that I love when they needed me the most. That’s when my doctor told me about FreshPotix.”

The ad then devolves into a typical prescription drug listing a myriad of hilarious “side-effects.” They include, but are not limited to:

“Severe Monkey Peen
Violent Fits of Rage Towards Left-Handed People
Extra Toe
Urge to Found Your Own Colony
Bald Ass
Cyrusvirus (your voice changes to that of Billy Ray or Miley)
Stomach Tail
Peptic Waltzing
Stool Entirely Made of Corn (Just a Cob)
Oxford Commas
Weeping Taint
Echola
Nose Chickens
Uncontrollable Tattling
Back Fro
Plaid Lung
Acid Washed Jeans
Tinselscrote (Break out of Chistmas Tree Tinsel on Balls)
Pauly Shore”

Now, obviously, FreshPotix isn’t real, but you can pretend like it does thanks to these new prescription pens that have been added to the Foo Fighters’ online shop. Each pen costs $4.99, and there’s a limit of two per order.

 

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Erica Banas is a rock/classic rock news blogger who's well versed in etiquette and extraordinarily nice.