Steel Panther Kicked A$$ On America’s Got Talent Last Night
Steel Panther has finally become a household name after rocking the America’s Got Talent stage. It went down during the competition’s qualifying round Tuesday night.
MMR’s listeners know Steel Panther well, and for more than just their hilarious presentation and faithful glam metal sound. You might remember their epic set from the 2012 MMRBQ. Our very own Preston “Tommy Tom Tom Thompson” Elliot filled in on the drum kit for Stix Zadinia.
The band’s lyrics are relentlessly vulgar. That’s especially true of the song they chose to play on Tuesday, “Death To All But Metal”. So you might be thinking: how on Earth were they allowed to perform on TV?
The rockers had to lighten up some of the song’s more offensive lyrics to keep the NBC overlords in their good graces. That involved omitting every potty-mouthed mention of private parts, bodily fluids, and sex acts found in the song’s original lyrics – of which there are many.
The result was a PG-13 rendition that contained all the satirical ridiculousness of the original and none of the profanity. Here’s some of our favorite changes:
“Death to Britney Spears, kill the little sl*t / Kill Madonna too and then f*ck her in the butt”
Was gracefully rewritten as:
“Death to Harry Styles, he makes me wanna cry / Adele and Lady Gaga, they both gotta die”
“F*ck Mariah Carey, death to Sheryl Crow / They can kiss each other on their camel toe”
Was eloquently revised to:
“Death to Justin Bieber, Death to Post Malone / Nails on a chalkboard makes a better tone”
We’re mostly impressed that they managed to turn a song which is essentially a series of death threats into something fun for the whole family, and the AGT judges seemed to agree.
The famously curt Simon Cowell gushed that the performance was his “favorite live show act so far”. Heidi Klum had to give props to the band’s spandex outfits and commitment to the hair metal look, Sophia Vergara was convinced that “America is going to love” Steel Panther – but we know they already do.
Although they didn’t advance to the next round of the competition, they put on a performance to remember and didn’t take themselves too seriously, which is, as far as we’re concerned, exactly why they rock.
Gavin Cuff, The Preston & Steve Show Staff
MMR Flashbacks: Steel Panther
