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Talk Like Bill Weston Day Secret Phrases

By Marisa Magnatta

This is it, the list of Talk Like Bill Weston Day secret phrases. All morning long we will randomly call listeners who texted in. Answer your phone with one of these phrases and you will win.

* If you stumbled on to this page without texting, then your phone number isn’t in the running… yet. Text BILL to 39333 to enter.

  • 1.

    Felicitations!  You’ve reached the law offices of Johnny Potato Chips and Susie Cream Cheese. Your case is currently filed under “who gives a crap”

  • 2.

    Greetings!  This is Bill Weston reminding you that when reaching for low hanging fruit it’s always wise to use a tiny three legged stool.

  • 3.

    Good morning, this is Bill Weston.  I can’t come to the phone right now because I’m on a Zoom conference with some very privileged  hom-yonkles.

  • 4.

    Hi, this is Bill Weston.  You know if three IS a magic number, then ten makes you sound like a desperate filthy loser. 

  • 5.

    Hello, this is Bill Weston and I’ve just added “discharge” and “erection” to words I hate as much as “soup.” 

  • 6.

    Hello and thank you for calling Barn Door vacation planners with daily trips to Cleveland where they always bring the ha ha! 

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  • Bill Weston Says the Darnest Things

    Bill’s greetings are just the darnest thing.  

  • Bill Weston Hates The Number Ten

    The boss hates the number 10. It just looks too weird. 

  • Bill Weston’s Church Reading

    Imagine you’re at church, and you hear the great Bill Weston giving a church reading.  

  • Bill Weston Gets Off

    Bill Weston prefers the Barn is open…with the low hanging fruit… when he gets off. 

  • Bill Weston's Halloween Costume

    Happy Halloween from Severus Snape… and his “little” friend. 

  • Personal Questions with Bill Weston

    Bill Weston asking Kathy some personal questions in the workplace 

  • Nick's Dream with Bill Weston

    Nick has a steamy dream of a shirtless Bill Weston, and it heats up the studio. 

  • Bill Weston & The Cunning Linguist

    Men, be careful. Bill Weston will try to steal your girl and show her what he’s about. 

  • Bill Weston gets trapped in a room with Jacky Bam Bam, Gary Lauer, & Pitchuation

    The Boss is locked in an Escape Room with a few of his favorite people in the world. Will he get out?

  • We're not picking favorites... but...

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