Dr. Keith Klosterman, a marriage and family therapist and Program Director for the Clinical Mental Health Counseling program at SUNY Fredonia, discussed family mental health during the holidays.   We discussed managing expectations and preparing ourselves for stressful situations through coping mechanisms that can be used throughout the year.  He reminds us that it’s okay to say ‘no,’ to plans or other requests for your time or to spending money.  You don’t have to be apologetic for living within your means or taking time for yourself.  With your children he advices to practice, listening, patience and tolerance.  Hear what they are saying, and answer questions and concerns honestly in age-appropriate terms.   Stepping back and taking a deep breathe can help deescalate your reactions.  Honesty is the key, based on their level of maturity and always remembering that kids are very astute and are often aware of their circumstances.  It’s okay to admit that you are feeling stress, or worry.  Dr Klosterman reminds us that stress relief can come from just going outside, taking a walk or listening to music.  We all experience stress, if you can anticipate it and be ready with your own coping devices, you’ll get through the holidays, but if you’re feeling overwhelmed and it’s impacting your daily life and relationships, reach out.  For more information and resources visit the American Psychologist’s Association at APA.org or the American Counseling Association at ACA.org.   In a crisis call 988.