Top 5 Things I Hate About Fall
There are some things I hate about fall.
Don’t get me wrong, fall is cute. There is definitely a vibe to autumn. We all love the crisp air, cozy sweaters, and pumpkin spice EVERYTHING. But, there’s a darker side to autumn. And by “darker,” I literally mean darker. Seriously? Where did the sun go at 4pm?
Here are the top 5 things I absolutely hate about fall.
1. The Betrayal of the Weather
Fall weather is like that flaky friend who says “Let’s hang out soon!” but never does.* One minute, you’re feeling the warm embrace of a sunny 65-degree day, and the next, a rogue wind shows up as a personal attack from winter itself. Should I wear a jacket? Or is it T-shirt weather? Why am I sweating while also freezing? I’m stressed and undecided and getting hives as I’m writing this.
*Author’s Note: I am that friend.
2. Pumpkin Spice Is Everywhere
Let’s just take a step back and address the fact that pumpkin spice does not need to infiltrate every aspect of our lives. Lattes? Love. Candles? Love. But pumpkin spice cough syrup? Hand soap? Dog treats? You can’t escape it.
3. Leaves, Leaves, & More Leaves
“Oh, the foliage is so beautiful!”—said everyone who doesn’t have a yard full of soggy, decaying leaves. Sure, they look amazing when they’re on the trees, but the second they hit the ground, it’s your problem now. You can rake them all day, but somehow, they’re still there. It’s like an endless game of leaf Jumanji, and spoiler: you’re never winning. Plus, they get stuck to your shoes, your car, and somehow even your dog. I feel like my goldendoodle is bringing the leaves inside on purpose at this point.
4. Fall Fashion Is a Nightmare
We all want to be that person casually sipping a latte in a chunky knit sweater, effortlessly looking Anne Hathaway adjacent. But the reality? Fall fashion is undecided. Cute boots? Sure, until you realize they’re cutting off circulation to your toes. Scarves? Honestly, now they just remind me of Jake Gyllenhaal. And don’t even get me started on layering—because by noon, you’re either sweating like you’re in a sauna or shivering like you’re on an Arctic expedition.
5. The Sun Goes to Bed Before I Do
I thought we had an agreement, Sun. You give me daylight until at least 7 PM, and I don’t complain. But fall? Nooo. Now it’s getting dark at 4:30, and I’m here thinking it’s midnight when it’s literally dinner time. My internal clock is messed up and suddenly I want to crawl into bed at 5 PM and give my Bravo binge a head start. Seasonal depression, you’re up!
Top Things I Hate About Fall
So there you have it, folks. Fall may come with its pumpkin patches and sweater weather, but let’s be honest—it’s also a little bit of a disaster. Sure, I’ll still sip my pumpkin spice latte and Instagram a pile of leaves with the audio of a Gilmore Girls transition behind it, but deep down, I know that autumn is just winter’s awkward, indecisive cousin. Now, where’s my heated blanket? I am freezing.
